she

when she talks to you, they have their moment

when she sings out loud, they have their strength

when she laughs out loud, they have their spirit

when she loves you, they have great time

their times stands and moves at the same time

their heart beats and stops at the same time

their world spins and stops at the same time

their blood in their veins gets warm and cold at the same time

because she do really care because she do really mean and when you don't come back, she dies away

when you don't love back, she cries bad

when you don't care much, she dies away

when you don't laugh,cry,sing with them

she do fly away.

because that is chasing them further apart

because that is scaring them further away

because she do really want to belong please do belong with them.

if i had a hammer on my hand i'd hit mylsef so bad, then i'd expect people to give me sympathy and attention. because i feel so alone and i need so much attention. it does not really matter how other people see me but the way i view myself is of a big essence. it does not really matter if people see me it does not really matter much if they dont see me Trust me even if i were as well off as i can ever imagine but that view i have of myself will drop my ego the lowest worst point again. it is also going to make people see me the very way i see myself. i will have to change my view of myself. and remember that change that is everlasting starts from within. if i can change the way i see myself then all other things will follow. all other views from all other people will suit. when i do a single simple mistake i hammer myself so bad that i feel i am worthless. i am stepping on eggshells and throwing my glasshouse with stones. make peace with myself. make peace with you. i do not understand why i do this to myself. do you understand why you do this? you are so conscious of your mistakes. all the problems we face, we go through are mental and within that is why they manifest. it is in us to work on them. let us work on that.

I am sure i can see that i am going through a lot and you are too. We need to sort our personal issues individually. If i am going to overlook my situations, then they will later catch up with me. You seem to be ignoring the reality too. For example, look at your condition as an individual, you know you are not ok at all. Neither am i. I do not believe any person can complete the other, but they can complement each other. In other words, if I be with you and I am not complete, I will bring inbalance to you. and likewise. it is wise for me to have some time for myselff. Can’t you see? it is sensible too, for you to have some time alone. Cant you see? quality time spent in prayer, introspction and conclusions for the best. good luck.

when he called he talked when he cried she listened when he said hello she said hi and they laughed. when he called he caught her offguard he listened to her voice so sweet and innocent when she laughed, he smiled. when he smiled, she blinked with light and sunshine the cord that linked them, the connection was so passionate. they laughed they smiled.

she is my mother

the woman i so much love this woman i so much resemble i think of her so often i hardly see her, like thrice a year though we talk often on the phone. i thought of her this morning. the woman whos been in my life since i was born this woman i carry her in my heart i copied everything in her the voice i speak the body i am the smile i have the colour of my skin the colour of my eyes this alone means so much to me i saw her smile at me this morning. we have some history together we have some story to tell but i long forgave her because she is my mother i know she has forgiven me too because i am her only sunshine i thought of her this morning. we both have been so much we both deserve better we both rely on each other we both connect in so many ways we both know each other we think of each other each morning. she is my mother.

i dream

of the things i dream of of the people i see in my dreams of the dreams i have in my sleep. the things i dream of in my life i live them everyday i intend reaching for them someday. ********************************** flying to a far away land where there is no familair face running to a farway desert where there is no familair animal driving to a farway place where there is no familiar scent.

please come back

I miss you, talking to you, writing and you writing back right away, laughing with you, holding your hands,fingers, seeing your face light up with happiness when I smile at you. I miss your stare, you telling me you see some beauty and more of it everytime you look at me. remember that? I think of the day we were working on your car, you under it and me sitting right next on the ground. The morning you were preparing to go back home, and you were giving me a couple of music videos and cds, and I asked if they were mine and you said they are ours not mine. I miss eating with you I miss feeding you, forcing the food in your mouth, begging you to feed for one last time. I miss seeing you strip and bath. I miss hugging you I miss hearing you sing a tune And listening to you talk while you touch your face at the same time. I miss saying to you, ‘babe don’t touch your face’ I miss you touching my behind after I spilled a drink on myself the afternoon we were eating at Mcdonalds’ I think of you, too often. Do u think of me?

the mountains we climb alone are steep and when we come down do we feel any difference. the silence we need alone when we come back do we feel any better. to ease our minds, to heal our hearts. to reconnect with our inner soul. to seek ourselves. to try to find peace. when we come back, do we feel any different. when we fly away when we drive away when we run away from our troubles. from our enemies when we come back, are we better people. do we go to the unknown world to seek the unknown truth do we go to the stranger places to seek unseen happiness do we go to the far away places to find something unfamiliar and when we do, do we do find what we need. and are we alone on this. or we take with us our finest familiar tools. or we expect them to wait for us and we want to find them waiting in once peace. when we come back? and when we find them, are they better people when we find them, are we better people. when we come back, when they come back, do we embrace them, do they welcome us? do we expect to continue where we left off?

hope

hope is a necessary part of my life because i can face anything, anybody and everybody that life throws at me. it is what gets me up in the morning because its my desire and my expectation to go on and have a rich life which is unfolding before myself, regardless of some circumstances at the moment. HoPe is ThE ThInG WiTh FeAtHeRs That PeRcHes In ThE SoUl aNd SiNgS tHe TuNe WiThOuT WoRds, AnD nEvEr StOps At AlL - EMILY DICKINSON the season is changing and with change comes good and bad things, but there is always a reminder that God is faithful. i trust that you are doing very well, and enjoying God's blessings.... KeEp hOpiNg.