i am

i am sitting on my one room, on my bed made of bricks lied together making a hard and strong base for my mattress...my back supported by my wall, on my lap lies my portfolio.....where i put down my thoughts, my dreams and my life.......setbacks and disappointments......hopes and promises....heartaches and headaches.....tears and rears...cheers and laughters................ as i look up the roofing my mind goes back to the time i was sitting on the same patch but the only difference is now i am in another town from the previous one...., and this one is not very far from my home village but the previous one was some thousand kilometers away and on a very rough patch by then and nobody to look at for some help, it was a new village, new people new environment, new house same experiment same feeling of hopelessness and hurt, same regrets and same person, same portfolio and same sitting pattern same posture and same thoughts same mind, same tears and equal heart...... 15 months ago everything looked and felt axactly the same except i had something to eat, a television set to watch, a wireless to play my music but miserable and fragile i felt like now. and now i only have in the room my luggage onto my chair, my handbag onto my 'bed' my two shoe pairs and a glass of water to keep my soul quenched.... where am i heading to.....and what is all this i feel i go through, telling me? am i not learning from all of this? am i not looking back at the basics to make corrections? like Kojo Baffoe has said,' excellence is about going back to basics and asking "how do i become better at this" why cant i do just that............ when this year started, the joys and reflects of point nil nil seven filled my heart.......and all the previous living had to be some learning curve and growth for myself at least thats what i expected but as i look up this iron sheets and read the bumpy lining on them i wonder, how can one same person go through one same patch and not grow from it and avoid it and learn from it and so on and so on...and maybe get a life! i keep praying for personal growth and guidance and strength. i may not be doing some things correctly, i might be not on the right route but i trust Jah is right here beside me on the same patch same posture straightening out His powers to touch me i recieve His blessings and believe am not alone.......He leads the way........